I know I'm asking for it (was Re: A MooTH! A THing!)

Deb Counts-Tabor wrote:

> > We have only 12 room nights out of 40 booked. If I cancel right now, I will owe them $1500.

To which Mal responded:

> What I see, though, is that
> anyone who stated their intention to go *before* Deb made that room
> commitment should, at the very least, book and pay for their room.

<snip>

> If, on the other hand, you just decided not to go after all? <snippage of lots of caustic, condescending remarks and foul language that all boil down to -> pay your share.

Before getting into the rest of the email, I just want to express my agreement with the underlying sentiment of the remarks above. A verbal/email committment made when Deb called for the final head count prior to signing the contract should be considered just as binding as the contract itself.

<snippage of lots more (progressively offensive) stuff, which prompted the following response>:

Honestly, Mal, I am very tired of opening my TH inbox to find it contaminated by your abusive emails. While I am aware that I could unsubscribe because you were here first, or you have seniority, or it's a free country and if I have a problem with your language and the content of your emails, that's just too bad, the fact is I have as much right to be here as you, and I have as much right to ask you to take it down a notch or two, just out of sheer courtesy to the rest of the House.

It's one thing to respectfully disagree with or respond to people's posts or behavior. Folks do that here on a fairly regular basis. However, it is entirely another to cast (largely unwarranted and uninformed) aspersions on someone's character, intellect, integrity, sexual preferences, religious practices...well, the list could go on and on because you are extremely creative when it comes to insulting folks. But this forum, in which we all agreed to treat each other with mutual respect when we joined, is not the place for exercising that abusive, albeit entertaining, talent.

> Make this right.

For the record, I am trying to make it right on my end. I sent Deb a private email asking what I could contribute to help defray the costs. I did this offlist because my financial information and our mailing addresses are not the business of the list at large, in my opinion. Just because I did not make that information public before now does not give you permission call my word, my integrity, and my character into question. If you want to claim your rant did not include me and was only directed at those who said yes and then backed out for reasons that *you* deemed inadequate, I say that's a load of b.s. Your email was sent to the list at large. Your accusations included everyone who originally said they were going and has since backed out. Your message gave no indication that you might have considered that some of those people could have already been moved by their own sense of right and wrong to try to "make it right." You just assumed that
their public silence must equate to a lack of moral fiber and blatant disregard and disrespect for a fellow Housemate.

Let me be clear - I'm not asking you to stifle your remarkable creativity and intelligence or curtail your activity in the House. When you're not insulting people, your posts are incredibly clever, entertaining, and contribute a great deal the online community established here. All I'm asking is that you introduce a little more respect into your posts that respond to something that has ticked you off.

- Kel, who really hopes that this email is not interpreted as an opportunity to personally attack Mal. I don't know the man well enough to personally attack him (and honestly, based on what little I do know, I kinda like and respect him). This is just a polite request that he tone down the impulse to verbally skewer fellow Housemates.